Tag Archives: self esteem

When You Love Your Body You Stop Trying To Be Perfect

lady-get-boobs-done

I had a friend that was a tall, slim, beautiful looking blonde. You would think that she would be thankful for that but no, all she wanted was to get enough money together so that she could have a boob job done. Hers were small and pert and she wanted bigger ones.

This was back in the days when it was mainly television stars that had the operation and that was obviously where she got the idea from. She would joke that if she had her boobs done, she would start jogging. The point here is that if she’d loved her body, she would have stopped trying to be what the advertising and television industry told her she should be and maybe spent more time thinking about how lucky she was to have such a healthy body.

Time has passed and it is more important than ever that you should love your body. The reason for this is that we are force fed a diet of idealism about the perfect female from the media.  This can make us dislike our body because it doesn’t fit into the mould. The reason that it doesn’t is because you are a beautiful individual. Once you start to truly believe that, you will begin to care for your body more and get healthier and fitter because you know that it is what your body deserves.

When you truly love your body, you work to get it to the best that it can be so that it can serve you well. This means that you stop trying to get to the media’s idealised state of perfection because you are comfortable with what you have got. Furthermore, when you love your body you begin to realise that it needs a reasonable amount of good quality food. This means that you are no longer willing to starve it or put it through fad diets. Neither will you go bonkers and over exert it on exercise regimes that are far too rigorous and therefore tend to get thrown by the wayside after a couple of weeks.

Have a good long think about all that your body does for you and give it the respect and love that it deserves. Once you do this and truly feel it, you will laugh at the idea of a perfect body because you will be confident enough to know that it is a load of old fiddlesticks.     

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Filed under Being Buoyant, love your body

How Dare You Think You Will Enjoy Great Literature!

The theme in my life this week has been self -esteem, or rather lack of it.  It seems that there is an epidemic going on.  I don’t know whether it is always there or I am noticing it more since I am on the last legs of Mulgrave Castle, a romantic mystery which has self- esteem as its theme.   Of course, lack of self -esteem comes in many guises.  The one I want to focus upon in this article is how other people can make you believe that you do not have the right to enjoy great literature.

Menabilly. Hidden by the woodland, Menabilly w...

Menabilly. Hidden by the woodland, Menabilly was the home of Daphne du Maurier, and the inspiration for Manderley in "Rebecca". (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Lack of self-esteem is universal, so much so that writers like Daphne Du Maurier have used it as a plot device.   In Rebecca, the main character who tellingly is never named, cannot believe that she has been rescued from being a paid companion by the older, attractive, handsome Maxim de Winter.  The whole of this wonderful, psychological drama hangs on the fact that the new Mrs de Winter has low self -esteem.  In fiction, that is fine.  In reality, it is not.  In Rebecca, we see obnoxious characters like Mrs Van Hopper chiselling away at her paid companion’s sense of self to make sure that she stays underfoot.  In reality, I get told by people how, when they were children,  grown-ups told them that writers like Shakespeare and Dickens were too difficult for them.  Let me catch my breath a moment whilst I let out an exasperated sigh.

Title page of the First Folio, by William shag...

Title page of the First Folio, by William shagsper, with copper engraving of the author by Martin Droeshout. Image courtesy of the Elizabeth Club and the Beinecke Rare Book & Manuscript Library, Yale University. http://beinecke.library.yale.edu/dl_crosscollex/brbldl/oneITEM.asp?pid=2018031&iid=1071364&srchtype= (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I have said it before and I will say it again – most people, if properly introduced and grounded in Literature will enjoy it at some level.  A case, in hand, I took a lesson about “The Laboratory”, a poem by Victorian writer Robert Browning to a mixed group of adults.  In the audience were three male fire fighters, two of whom were positive Victorian poetry was most definitely not for them.   After the lesson, the two fire fighters who were sure that they would just switch off from this stuffy old nonsense, said that they had actually enjoyed it.  The general consensus of the group was that if they had had that lesson whilst at school, they would all see Literature differently.  I was lucky that I had great English teachers.  As the years have gone by, it has slowly dawned on me how many people either were not taught writers like Shakespeare or it was offered in an unhelpful way.  This leads me to ask – why is there a sense of elitism with writers like Shakespeare?  After all, let’s think back, Shakespeare wrote and performed his plays mostly for the Joe Bloggs and Fanny Rumble’s of the sixteenth century.  Okay, so he performed in front of Elizabeth I, but mostly it was in front of ordinary people like me.  So, I say to you, whoever you may be, LITERATURE IS FOR YOU.

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Filed under Education, Self Esteem and Literature